Monday, June 8, 2015

Corners

I've never liked corners. I hate the corners of pillow cases when I am trying to fold them. I have the round, elusive corners of fitted sheets. I am not a fan of being scared -- think walking around a corner and being scared. Or extremely loud cracks of thunder. I might be the only person on the planet that doesn't want a corner piece of cake.

Nope.

And I definitely do not like the dusty, crusty corners in our house that need to be cleaned as we pack to move in a couple weeks. I am aware that we live in mild filth. For me, cleanliness of NOT next to godliness. Matching socks, twice weekly baths, and buffalo wings are next to godliness. Seriously, though, not the wings. If godliness is prayer and studying the Scriptures and trying to be like Christ, then being with my family and sleeping are as close to godliness as it get for me right now.

I was challenged on Wednesday evening in a lesson on prayer that even those of us with young kids (read: people for whom personal time is a rare, nebulous, highly prized thing) need to carve out time for prayer. In this particular class we read many passages where Jesus prayed with or for or on behalf of people. If Christ can make a prayer his final, dying words, perhaps I can find some time while I am LIVING to be more consistent in prayer.

Just for the record, I do pray. Often. For my sanity. And lots of other things, too! It's just that I don't have a specific time set aside where I enter prepared to focus and listen and speak. I pray on the fly for things that are urgent or for the random thoughts that pop into my head. We pray while we are doing support raising work. We pray with the kids when they are upset or anxious. I pray at small group or with someone having a hard time. I pray for those grieving.

So, I believe I was writing about cleaning and corners which somehow led to godliness and prayer. Makes perfect sense.

The thing about corners is that they can be dark, sharp, hidden and easy to avoid. Like the parts of our spiritual life we'd rather ignore.

My prayer life is a dusty corner I'd rather not deal with right now. I have a kid who wakes us between 6:00-6:30 in the morning. Right when I am entering REM sleep. EVERY. DAY.

Early morning doesn't seem like an option. But maybe it is.

Then the day begins. And both of my kids like to interact with us all day long. Weird. Wonderful. But I haven't figured out how to create/maintain/enforce solitude.

Our move is a transition ripe with possibility, though. New habits. New routines. New, new, new. I have some ideas for creating a space for solitude in my day. The challenge is doing that now, before we move. For the next two weeks I will venture into this dusty corner and see what the Lord will do. I make no promises. I'll keep doing my crazy-mom-life praying but I am seeking each day to pray on purpose. 

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